Feel it to heal it!

This photo was taken by my beloved in the outskirts of Austin TX the one time we chose to break our quarantine of over a month so we can take a ride out in the country side for our mental wellbeing. The Universe had other plans for us that evening. The car broke down on us and we had to reach out for help, having to come in contact with our helpers. One of them was a dear friend who I was very happy to see and very sad to not be able to hug, as we still maintained physical distance the best we could. Oh, the cosmic joke!

IN ORDER TO HEAL WE GET TO FEEL

(words by Adam Roa)

These words are ringing truer right now than ever before.
How beautiful that we get to feel what it’s like being ALIVE!
And even when it is so painful, sometimes. Often times, lately.
All the sadness, all the sorrow, all the anguish, all the pain…

Maybe your experience is completely different; maybe it’s filled with joy and pleasure, and that’s completely valid, also.
Each journey is unique, and each psyche gets to unfold in its own due time. Plenty of ebbs and flows for all flavors.

It took millennia of ancestry to bring us to where we are. The timing of what’s unfolding, in comparison, is a blink of an eye.

What’s going on out there is a reflection of what’s unfolding within each of us.
With all its shadows and light, each gives meaning to the other, all coming from the same Source.

AND, we can no longer afford to haul our past, our pain, and our trauma along where we are headed; it is time to compost it all!
It all serves its purpose, until it no longer does. It is time to let go…
This is a one way journey to Oneness.

And while on this journey…
May you see the beauty that is your existence, with all the shadows, for they give meaning to light.
May you choose love over fear, as you feel and heal within and without.
May you remember the ephemeral nature of it all, joy and sorrow, sadness and pleasure, and everything in between.
And may you finally realize the Oneness that we all are, unconditionally, eternally.

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As deep as you feel it

Some days I lay face down on the grass, feeling caressed by the Mother, feeling her heartbeat, as she soothes my pain and drinks my tears. While I hurt feeling the collective suffering, I feel her heal.⁣⁣⁣
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Other times I stare at the sky, the marvelous vastness and beauty of the mystery beyond my human mind’s understanding of all that’s out there. I bathe in the sunlight, healing my deepest crevices. I reach for the clouds and stars with my voice and prayers, as I cry a little inside… ⁣⁣⁣
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The Moon is my witness and my nightly companion. As she ebbs and flows dancing with shadow and light, my heart does, too.⁣⁣⁣
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I cry, I sing, I dance, I laugh and weep, for all those who can’t. ⁣⁣⁣
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I feel the pain for all those in suffering, physical and mental. The root is all the same.⁣⁣⁣
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I bow to all the angels who are holding us through these times; ethereal ones and the human ones in the frontlines and hospitals. ⁣⁣⁣
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I practice compassion for all those who continue on the path of shadows. For all those who choose to repeat rather than evolve. You can’t rush healing or learning. That I’m coming to understand the hard way. ⁣⁣⁣
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The times, they are changing, and my heart remains open, as I gather her pieces and remember the dance, once again… ⁣⁣⁣
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“…go as deep as you feel it, ⁣⁣⁣
the deeper you mean it, ⁣⁣⁣
the more the stars can hear it. ⁣⁣⁣
The deeper you mean it, ⁣⁣⁣
the more healing can happen, ⁣⁣⁣
the Earth heart opens, ⁣⁣⁣
connects to your own…”⁣⁣⁣
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Beautiful music 🎶 by Ayla Nereo

Entering the 33rd Portal

2019 has been the most profound year so far in my inner journey of awaking since I made that conscious choice in 2012. And there have been many outstanding moments during these last 7 years filled with lessons and experiences I could have not imagined. I have watched my life unfold and transform multiple times taking unpredictable turns that have stretched me way beyond my comfort zone over and over again.

This year I was taught to trust in surrendering, in the unknown, in the non-sense, in the darkness, to trust my shadows, to allow my mind to not make any sense as the heart took the lead. I have witnessed my ego die over and over again, remembering my true identity as an eternal soul. Some of these micro deaths have been surrounded by a dance of fear, acceptance, and love that by letting go, I might have let go of this reality as the human experience that I’ve been on, let go of all the suffering, release any contracts, transcend all dimensions, with the promise of the ultimate self-realization. As I watched this dance, realizing there was another play of my ego, my human body persevered as my heart reminded me of a bigger purpose that is still unfolding, my soul’s journey.

I have been working with the healing powers of the Earth, her sacred medicine in many forms. I have undergone some of the most beautiful out-of-this-world experiences that as a human being I can only dream of. I have lost and found myself over and over again across realms, deep in meditative states, down under in the depths of my own shadows, and highest up heights in the source of it all, returning to my soul’s Earthly home. Yet, here I am, still attempting to put into words the non-sense of the soul’s journey, witnessing through the lens of this human experience.

This is not a linear journey; that I have come to inner-stand. I continue to explore, discover, and experience what I came here for. I continue to connect, touch and be touched by fellow souls, seeing my reflection all around, as the mirror for the Divine to experience BEing. This is not writing for the mind. Only heart can decipher this manuscript. Welcome hOMe, Sacred ONE! May you love your way through this process of unBEing.

Life lessons from 32 laps around the Sun

At the beginning of December I celebrated my 32nd birthday. The last three years I have arranged to celebrate my birthday traveling in a new country and saying yes to a new experience. On my 30th I was in Bali  scuba diving for the first time and absolutely loved every second of it, followed by traveling around India on my 31st. This new tradition of celebrating the day I came into this world has been absolutely amazing and I do wish to continue it hopefully inspiring others to say yes to life, fully.

This year, since my partner and I will be traveling to a new country over the winter holidays – Guatemala, here I come – and my birthday is on December 6, I celebrated it in U.S. at home while still saying yes to a new experience – floating. I will soon create a dedicated post about that experience, so stay tuned. Meanwhile, while spending this birthday at home and taking time to reflect, I wrote a list of life-lessons from these 32 years in this world which feel like the highlight messages from all that I have experienced so far in life. So, here they are, may they inspire you in some way:

  1. To live, truly live, you must leap, even when you can’t see the other side. That’s how you got here anyways. Crying was just your way of announcing your arrival.
  2. Love and affection are vital. You learned this as a newborn. As an adult, that love and affection must come from you, first, then reflect it to others.
  3. Curiosity keeps creativity alive. Life herself stems from creativity. If you can imagine it, it can be done.
  4. It takes courage to be alive, truly alive by choice. Courage is the most important muscle that you get to work on your entire life. It’s never finished.
  5. Cherish family and be grateful that you have one even with all its flaws and complications. You choose them for this life time. Honor your soul’s choice by loving them unconditionally. And let them teach you whatever it is that you need to learn from them.
  6. Play like no one is watching. Especially when you grow up. Sing, dance, move, make up your own world and rules. This is essential to keeping your heart and mind young and healthy.
  7. Animals are your best friends and can be your most loyal companions. Don’t be afraid of them no matter their shape, form or sounds. They can be your wisest teachers, too. Listen and observe them.
  8. Anyone can be your teacher, if you pay close attention; humans from all walks of life, animals, situations especially ones that challenge you, environment as well. And above all, Nature teaches you the most important lessons of them all: how to be.
  9. Nature is your sanctuary. Make time to honor her by being with her. You can commune with her anywhere, for you are part of her through the air that you breathe. Fill your cup with her essence.
  10. You can always start over. No matter the timing. Not matter how many times. Remember courage. You don’t need to know how, yet. Just be willing.
  11. When you fall, feel first, and then get up. Only once you learn to embrace the mud, you will learn to fully appreciate the beauty of the lotus.
  12. Express yourself. Others cannot read a closed book. Speak your truth and stand by it. Give others the opportunity to truly see you in your light of truth.
  13. Love and appreciate this body, every inch of it, just as it is, every moment of every day. It is as beautiful as the starry night, for it is made of those stars.
  14. To honor your feelings, you first need to fully feel them. Feel them before you label them. Then you can process them and release. Give yourself time.
  15. When in a sea, ocean, river, lake, waterfall or any other natural body of water, let your inner mermaid play wild. Embrace the depth and the beauty of the unknown. Remember courage.
  16. Embrace heart aches, even if there have been many, and there will likely be more to come. Each one grows your heart stronger for it teaches you how to heal.
  17. Even though you think you know so much, there is always so much more to learn. Always be open to your path and your journey. (thank you Nahko!)
  18. You are unique and sacred, so honor yourself as such. Love will always show you the way.
  19. Trust the unknown, explore your edges and always stay curious.
  20.  Learn to say no, and mean it. It will create space and get you closer to your true yes.
  21. You can only help someone else if they want to be helped. Otherwise you are doing both a dishonor.
  22. When someone or something is sucking your life force out of you, summon the courage to walk away, even if you are scared of any consequences. Set yourself free.
  23. The biggest gift your can give yourself is time and space to heal. Appreciate silence.
  24.  Allow others to cherish you, appreciate you, and love you. Even when you are having a hard time to do all these things for yourself. You deserve it.
  25.  Get out of your own way. Step back and allow things to take their course. Take your time to shift prospective, rather than take action from a skewed one.
  26.  Dream and seek your own dreams. Don’t spend your life trying to live out other people’s dreams for you, or their unrealized dreams. You are your own person.
  27. Plan, but also leave room for creativity and serendipity to play out. You never know how amazing the unknown can turn out, until you trust.
  28.  It’s ok to not know, even if you feel like you should or it would make you look bad to admit it. Always embrace the opportunity to learn.
  29.  The only effective way to teach someone else is to lead by example. Talk the walk, but also walk that talk.
  30.  Leap. Leap again. Trust, trust again. Courage always. Enjoy the ride, with all the ups and downs, as well as the blind corners. It’s all part of this journey called life.
  31.  Adventure keeps you young. Never let go of the opportunity for one. And if no opportunity shows up, create it.
  32.  Honor what has come before so you can love what is, and appreciate what is ahead. Every breath is a new beginning.

I had many more revelations of life lessons from my years in this world so far, but I chose to narrow the list to these 32 points, as they felt the most prominent ones. Which ones resonate with you the most? Do you have any other ones you would add? I would love to hear from you. Reach out and share with me on Instagram.  Meanwhile, I hope this has inspired you to reflect on your own life-lessons and say yes to life more.

With love and gratitude,

~ Erinda

The Purest Form of Love

This is an anthem to LOVE. All kinds of love, starting with self-love. Self being i, I, you, You, we, We, and everything before, after, and in between. Because in order to truly love anything or anyone, we must first learn and experience loving our own existence. At the end we realize that, just as at the beginning in the womb, we emerge from one, live to remember love, and to oneness we return.

~ ~ ~

from love i came into existence

and into love i shall return

for i am made of love

and with love i am created

i channel love

so i can create love

i make love to feel love

and to breathe love

i emanate love

to share love

i give love freely

and in love i live

for the sake of love

i take each and every breath

breathing in, out and through love

because love is what i am

and in love i recognize you

and in you i see me

through the purest love

you and i become we

as at the beginning

so at the end

there is no you

there is no me

love is all that has ever been

and all that will ever be

~ ~ ~

This love anthem-mantra-affirmation-poem was channeled through me in a state of profound meditation, inspired by the beautiful song ‘Bliss’ sang by Sirgun Kaur. Listen and enjoy it below.

With deep gratitude,

~ Erinda